Are you a Negative Nancy

Now we probably all know at least one of those people who negative about things in their life.  They are negative about their jobs.  They cannot tell you anything that is good about their coworkers or the place they work or the kind of work they do.  They negative and yet they don’t look for another job.

They are negative about their social life and don’t do anything to change their social life.  They don’t bother to find other places to go or change their behavior.  They complain about their family life and what they have to do with their families.

Now they may have good reason to be unhappy but at the same time if we are not happy we need to make changes.  I  know that when I spend to much time on those who are negative I find that I get down.  So I try not to spend to much time with those who are always negative.

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Who are we?

I was flipping through the channels last night and found a movie called Radio Rebel.  It is all about a girl who is shy and does not like to talk in public but ends up doing a radio show.   What made me think what do when it comes to talking in public and talking to new people.

Now in a previous life I had to speak in front of a large groups of people regularly.  I even had to speak several thousand of people.  Even now in my job I am talking to groups of people and I have to attend a lot of social events where I may or may not know people.  When it comes to my professional life or work life I can go out of who I am and talk to whoever I need.  I remember in college in my fraternity I was responsible for talking to prospective members.  Many I had never talked to before the events.

Now when it comes to my personal or social life that is a different issue.  My friends laugh at me because I may see someone across a room that I think is good looking and possibly my type and I will not go over and talk to them.  I am just so shy that I won’t go over and talk to them.  There was one time that friends even tried to bring someone over to meet and I couldn’t find a place to hide.  Now I know that seems extreme but I am that shy when it comes to my personal life.

The interesting thing is that in today’s society shyness can be overcome by the internet.  People can talk to other people in chat-rooms and message boards where the fear can be overcome.  Some of it I think is because they don’t actually see the person.  That can actually be a hindrance for people to overcome the shyness in dealing with other people.

So whatever the issue the most important thing is that we interact with each other.

Why be interested in what others do?

I am not sure how many people have heard that Washington State passed marriage for same sex couples.  I was listening to an interview where the opponents said that the winners should not celebrate to long as they planned to change their joy.

Now that got me thinking why are these peoples so concerned with a civil marriage of other people.  I have yet to see a law that allows same sex marriage to apply to other than those who are participating in it.  Why are they so concerned about what other people do?

Maybe some of those who are so against it should maybe work on their own relationships and not other peoples.

What is Religion

Today I got into a rather interesting dialog with someone about religion.  Now I know some will say that is a dangerous topic to have since most people have very strong feelings about their religious denomination or tradition.  The interesting thing was that we both came from very different backgrounds and it was a lively discussion.

One of the points that we talked about was whether or not people should question their faith.  Now I am not trying to argue that there is or is not a God (or whatever word you like to use).  That is a personal thing and I respect whatever one believes.  What I was talking about was questioning the rules and norms of a given faith tradition.  Next week will be lent in some Christian traditions depending on what calendar you follow.  With that custom there are a number of things that people will do during that time period.  I am not going to go into all of those customs here since it would require a lot more time than I have to create this post.

What I question is why people do those traditions.  One I will mention is the tradition of giving up something for lent.  Now I have known people who would give up alcohol or smoking for lent.  Once lent was over with they were back to smoking or drinking as they were before.  Nothing changed in their lives after the time period.  There was no growth in the lives of these people.  I feel that as a person I need to continue to grow as a person.  That should apply in our faith or spiritual life.  If we do something in a faith tradition why don’t we ask what we will be getting out of this action.  For some they go year after year going through movements of a faith tradition and nothing happens.

So as a more mature person I need to continue to explore and challenge why I do things and what am I doing to grow.

Yuck Valentines

Okay we are going to be celebrating another holiday that is not the favorite of mine.  Now this holiday is all about love people say.  The interesting things that there was a real Saint Valentine and this saint has nothing to do with love.

I find this holiday to be interesting in that people go out of their way this day to express love to another person.  For some this is the only day they are romantic.  I find that interesting because if you are in a relationship or dating romance should be a regular part of the relationship.  It should not be left to one time a year.  If you only wait till this one day the relationship is doomed to end.

Church and Politics

I was looking at the front page of the local paper and there was an article about the local church and the recent issue of the government requiring birth control to be covered by insurance plans.  Now I am annoyed that people can take things and try to force religion on others.

Now I am a religious person in that I do have a spirituality.  What I get annoyed is when  church or denomination says you can’t do this or that because it says in the bible or the church says so.  I was taught growing up that my decisions are based on free will.  So if that is the case then why is the church saying I can’t do something.  How is it free will?

Now back to the issue of birth control and insurance coverage. Just because an insurance company is told they need cover it does not mean that someone has to use it.  Just because there is a bowl of condoms in school clinic does not mean the kids have to pick some up.  I think it is important that people have options.  They should have the option to have sex and they should have the option to avoid bringing an unwanted or unexpected child.

Why is the church so hot and bothered about this issue?  Personally I think the reason they want to get hot and bothered about this issue is because they don’t have the control over the people they used to have.  I personally don’t need someone controlling my life.

People come into our lives for a reason

The title of today’s blog comes from a line in the show Wicked.  Now it is also quoted in a number of other writings.  Philosophers have argued this point.  Religious people will say that God brings people into our lives.  Well whatever position you want to take I feel that every person that comes into our life did so for a reason.

Now as I was reflecting on this idea today I thought of a lot of people I don’t talk to or correspond in some way with.  Some I lost contact information and have no idea where they are in this world of ours.  I am sure they are out there somewhere and hopefully alive and safe.  I after all don’t want to wish bad on people because I believe what goes around comes around.  There are some who I knew through work relationships and we in my life for a period of time.  I know there are some who I know from this part of my life that will probably say good thing I don’t know where they are they don’t want to talk to me anyway.

There are those who touch our lives through dating situations and I think that group is better left alone in this conversation.  Now some of this group I wish I still was in contact and things could have been different. Some of this group I may have learned a lot from.

I could keep going on the list but one thing for sure is I have learned from all these people.  Some have challenged me in different ways.  Some of those challenges resulted in me becoming a better person.  Some have ended in stalemate or arguments.  Some I do wish were different.  Either way I know that I carry a part of them in me.

I am hoping that each person who has crossed my path in this life was changed a little by the encounter and that it was for the better.  I know that each person who crosses my path does that for me.  Sometimes I realize it right away and other times it takes a little time.

Look at your life and see who has crossed yours?